Once upon a time a teacher said to my youngest grandchild and her class it would be fun to make a family tree! I have reservations about pottering around long ago memories but as I have grown older they hurt less and maybe begin to see the people involved in a more sympathetic light.
No this is not a long saga about how cruel they were, they were not, it was just an unusual upbringing, which involved my adoption and three stepmothers.
But the delving into family history has brought to light that I have five half siblings and when my daughter had an email from someone who's DNA matched up with hers, and had signed himself 'your cuz' - we were off again and the mad hunt for answers.
I think the only answer I want is what happened to my half brother Peter who I was brought up with for a few years and my cousin Barry - we formed a trio. And the last I was to see of these two was when I went to their new boarding school, Tettenhall College in Wolverhampton and they were sobbing in the car not wanting to go in. A lasting impression.
I did actually meet Peter once when I was widowed and my stepmother arranged a meeting, and he hobbled into the pub with a stick having suffered a car accident - and that was it. A photo of Peter and myself, I only own three photos of my childhood.
Last night I had to try and convince my granddaughter, that my name is Thelma and not Janet as my biological mother had called me, there are, probably in the boxes in the basement here, several documents relating to my adoption but the great secrecy of it was hidden until the death of my grandfather and not produced until I was 27 years old, widowed and with a young child. Those were the days!!!
Today all that is water under the bridge but of course when another relative pops up claiming kinship I am not sure I want to go there.
I cannot imagine your childhood situation, or being widowed at 27. That was a good-looking car that you good-looking kids are standing in front of.
ReplyDeleteConsidering my grandfather fled from the Germans in Belgium with nothing but his wife Catherine, and a Pekinese dog tucked into her coat, he seemed to be earning well to afford such a car. Though he was a very clever man.
DeleteMy son was at Tettenhall College but I think we long ago decided they were not there at the same time didn't we?
ReplyDeleteYes Pat in a way it is a recurring thought, not helped by the fact that my granddaughter wants to know the history.
DeleteHave you looked for Peter or Barry online? I often Google people I knew in the past to see what has happened to them. Sometimes it is easy to find them but others are not.
ReplyDeleteI watch a program called "Finding your Roots" where they trace the ancestors of different celebrities and they often find interesting circumstances or previously unknown connections to add to their family trees. There are often tears when they realize what the people before them have gone through compared to their own lives now.
Yes Ellen, we have one old address so might chase that up.
DeleteI wonder whether teachers would still ask this. Not all family trees as happy ones, and I could imagine lots of difficulties when with children from corflict regions.
ReplyDeleteAn interesting point Tasker, digging up past history doesn't always bring joy. But I am sure the teacher did not mean any harm, just an interesting project.
DeleteI watch all the family history programmes on tv and the joy when families are reunited is very touching. As you never wanted to find out about your family (didn't know the extended one existed) then your emotions will be more distant. I have just discovered that Keith's family name appears in Emmeline Pankhurst's family tree. Since all with our version of the spelling are related (as per Manx DNA testings), that's fascinating to read. Can't quite tie the William C down to a particular parish though. . .
ReplyDeleteLillie is the one that follows through on the names, I find it confusing and here I must add Jennie family trees puzzle me as they branch out into unknown waters. I see from your blog the tracking down of Keith's heritage, well done. Lillie wants royalty in the family ;)
ReplyDeleteI've been doing extensive family research on the various branches of my maternal side and for the most part it's a long and backbreaking relationship with the land. It's not until the 20th century that the women start training as nurses providing a few professional roles. Lots of innkeepers and a few wannabe jockeys until the railway buys up the land! You might mention that wishing for royal connections is a double edged sword. My grandmother's mother was the eldest daughter of minor nobility who married a commoner. She brought with her a gene for early dementia and an indoctrination that her children and subsequently grandchildren were too good to play with or have friends amongst the normal village offspring leading to incredibly lonely childhoods. Thankfully the dementia gene didn't pass down through my grandmother and those sisters who took after their father but the ones who favoured their mother and their children had all succumbed by sixty, devastating the lives of the families and spouses forced to look after them at home.
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