|Stoney Littleton entrance stone|
Well I have probably got it wrong so apologies to Tom about missing ammonites. But Stoney Littleton long barrow was a great favourite of mine. So I went and found it in my blog posts. How I studied and dreamed of those long barrows that had disappeared in the valley around this particular long barrow. It was August 2007, and then as I read through the blog, written in my usual naïve enthusiasm I saw there was one comment at the end, it was from Paul/Littlestone, at the very start of our relationship. Here I must add much to the horror of my daughter (mum be careful of online chats!) Later on we met at a social gathering at Avebury and everything developed from there.
Strangely enough I was chatting to our lady window cleaner yesterday and we talked of grief. She had lost her much younger husband to cancer three years ago, and had two large dogs to keep her company, one of which was in the van because he was needy;) As we chatted it turned out that she was a Jehovah Witness, but seemed to believe that humans should live forever to experience this wonderful world. When down to earth me said, ALL THE PEOPLE, wasn't it easier to listen to the young crow fledglings in the copse, knowing that they will be born, live and die. I have read a lot about spiritual beliefs and accept we must all believe in what we believe, it is not for me to scoff, or that matter for you;) Paul never knew she was JW or he would have argued it out with her, but she is a gentle soul making a living by cleaning windows (could do better though).
Acceptance of grief is impossible, you live with it, it breaks through the wall stabbing the heart with its pain, but in the end most of us have to face up to it, the tears a relief.
So the blog I wrote on that day 14 years ago. I took Paul up to my favourite place later on, we explored so much together round the area of Wiltshire, especially churches, and so that whole frame of happy memories linger on. So this is for me!