Reached a low which is hard to come up from, but have been doing things for the future. Some of that future makes me sad, whilst the need to enervate myself into action is to do with decisions. My eyesight is going quite quickly therefore I need to move into a town. This means renting a flat somewhere and hopefully in West Yorkshire.
I shall be sad to leave here, the garden has all the trees, shrubs and plants which I hold dear and which I look forward to seeing each summer. But there are other plants to see and different landscapes to wander around.
The churchyard is full of snowdrops and the sun is shining today. Coffee to be had in an hour or so. Sorting out books. Well there is something to do, if I find reading difficult I can let go of a lot of books and reduce. Already those odd balls of wool have met their end in the dustbin and scraps of patchwork. Actually I like throwing things away, reducing the things we carry around in life.
I am sure this mood will go, funnily enough I had a nightmare last night, there was this large ghostlike figure hanging over my bed, bearded and wild haired, thought it was God for a moment come to rage at me;) All those year of atheism wasted for goodness sake!
So as we move into spring, things will be changing, and I must find the energy to see things through, and also find that funny slant to life which always sends me chuckling. The Scottish spat looks interesting - Sturgeon/Salmond. Does the future of the independence of Scotland rest on the squabble of two individuals?